Evolve Faster – How to Identify Your “Work” and Experience Exponential Personal Growth

Have you ever said to yourself “Ugh! If I could just figure out X, Y, or Z I’m pretty sure my life would be complete. I could finally be at peace.” ? 

We all seem to be “seeking” something – whether healing, truth, cosmic intelligence, world history, god, financial success, connection and happy relationships; most of the time what we seek is the result of some earlier pain driving us towards that which we don’t understand but yearn to understand, so we free ourselves from its hold on us. A lot of the time this drive is unconscious. 

There’s a human tendency to assume that what we don’t know is “the answer” to all our problems. So we begin searching for what we don’t know. While this can work out in the long term, this is the slow evolutionary path. 

Nothing is hidden from us that we’re READY for. 

A pain-free body, a pain-free mind, the right relationship or career, even spiritual “enlightenment.” I would argue that all of these are right in front of and/or within us at all times, but we can only see their full potential when we are ready to do what is necessary to manifest them.  

Since we are nature and not separate from her intelligence, we will continue bumping up against something I call “nature’s checks and balances” in every area of life, but especially when we seek healing. 

Click here to read/watch my first blog and video about this concept of “nature’s checks and balances.” This post takes a deeper look at one aspect of this theory of mine.

Nature is fractal, quantum, never linear. 

Thus, healing is rarely (maybe never?) linear but rather fractal or quantum in nature. Healing happens in fits and spurts, in large leaps of consciousness and again in contractions, in forgetfulness and taking a few steps backwards before expanding tenfold. 

We circle and circle the same path, the same questions, the same answers, the same patterns…like a geometric spiral, we grow out of something imperceptible and beyond our conscious awareness, into something exponential and beyond our wildest imaginations when we first set off on the path. 

And because each of us are unique – your physiology, biology, genetics, emotions, and thought life are unlike mine, creating a special “pandora’s box” all your own (while I have my version) – there is no guidebook I can hand you that will tell you what your first step is, or second, third or hundredth. 

There is no straight path for any of us. 

However, there are a few “rules” that we can discover within nature’s checks and balances that I have come to understand (ultimately by taking the long way and learning these lessons the hard way), that can help us stop fighting nature and begin evolving faster. 

There’s a “secret” I’ve learned that seems to confound so many of us: you don’t have to go looking for anything. You don’t have to search for your trauma, or your repressed memories, or some piece of obscure hidden knowledge that will liberate you from whatever it is that set you on the path of searching to begin with. 

Whatever you’re supposed to engage with is whatever is most obvious to you. 

Your life is your curriculum. 

Whatever pain you’re currently experiencing, whatever challenges or “roadblocks” you’ve identified, and most certainly whatever is most painful right now – these are your lessons and incubators, or put another way: the chrysalis you must become before you can turn into a free butterfly.  

Before you can get where you want to go, you have to be where you are. 

Do you have physical pain? That’s nature (god/higher wisdom) trying to engage you, inviting you to deepen your self knowledge and learn some of her wisdom through your body. Your body has a message for you. 

Are you facing relationship challenges, family challenges, social challenges? That is nature trying to engage you, inviting you to deepen your knowledge of how to be with others, how to be with yourself, how to communicate. A deeper wisdom is trying to hold you accountable to learning and growing in this arena. Your relationships are challenging you to evolve. 

If you have financial pain or lack purpose, that is nature trying to engage you; maybe it’s your soul calling you to listen, maybe a higher purpose is meant for you, or maybe you’re supposed to learn to be with uncertainty long enough to see what’s meant for you. There’s a message and a lesson here waiting to evolve you. 

When we humble ourselves and open our hearts and minds to what life is trying to teach us right now this very moment, we open ourselves to spiritual wisdom, to the wisdom of nature that wants to move through us and express herself through us in order to evolve this planet and evolve human consciousness. 

We don’t have to go looking for anything, and we’ll evolve a lot faster by working with “what is.” 

We get ourselves into trouble when we think we should be further along a path than we actually are. This is nothing but self delusion. (Trust me: I tend to run fast out of the gait, because in my mind I’m always faster/stronger/more evolved than I actually am, and then I get forced to slow way down, and often this tendency sidelines me for a lot longer than if I’d just started slow to begin with!) 

Whether you are seeking more vitality, freedom from pain/injury, healthier relationships, purpose and financial freedom or something more spiritual – you will get “there” (wherever there is to you) much faster by engaging with “what is” and allowing life to evolve you organically, than you will by marching forward on a straight path from A to Z that leads only to a narrow reflection of yourself.  

Example: you want physical freedom, so you smash your fascia and get the stem cell injections and work out aggressively, without realizing that perhaps the pain you were feeling had a deeper message for you; meanwhile, your relationships are suffering, or you’re miserable in your career, but you think those issues are separate from this issue of your body…but they are all connected, and your body is talking to you about your life. 

This path isn’t easy. 

In fact, it can be downright excruciating in body, soul and spirit. But it is precisely in the painful experience of confronting “what is” (over and over) that we evolve and gain attributes like courage, self trust, knowledge, wisdom, perseverance, objective perception, fortitude, joy, grace, forgiveness, love…these are all forged in the fires of heartbreak, physical agony, betrayal, rejection, shame, regret etc. 

Wherever you are right now, whatever your life looks like at this moment – that is your “curriculum.” 

The video contains a few stories of mine that helped me form this theory, and more information on how to work with “what is” with grace and self-compassion. 

Please share any thoughts you have in the comments section below. 

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  • Melissa says:

    You have such a wonderful way of explaining things!
    Last year, I was having pelvic floor issues. I did a lot of research and came across a piece regarding trauma; how we can hold trauma. The piece considered women that have been sexually abused tend to hold trauma in their pelvic floor region and causes pain issues for decades afterwards. I found this fascinating; the muscle(s) memory.
    And years ago, I worked with a ‘healer’ and did a forgiveness session that was focused on breath work and guided meditation. It was liberating and healing.
    Thank you so much for all the work you do and all the important content you provide!

    • Hi Melissa – you’re welcome! Thank YOU for doing your own healing work (not easy), and for being here. I believe each of us taking ownership of our bodies/minds/spirits, helps to free the world from chaos. Sometimes hard to believe we make any difference when we look outside, but I do believe all this inner work and healing our own bodies and nervous systems is key to healing our world.

  • antonio says:

    I share the same truth 🙂 lovely presented

  • Lynn says:

    This recovering Type AAAA personality so relates, thank you for sharing.
    I’ve proven to myself that all you say is true ::))

    • Lynn – Yep. It’s a steep learning curve for us A types! I’m still practicing this all the time.

  • Lori says:

    I appreciate you!

    • ☺️ Right back at ya 💜

      • frankiewicz says:


  • FL Girl says:

    So, I hear what you’re saying but people who have been exposed to trauma can often be disconnected to their bodies/emotions so HOW do we “be where we are”? I want that more than anything so I can move forward but, regardless of WHAT I do that movement doesn’t happen. Any suggestions appreciated and THANK YOU for your videos. I would also love to know where you are currently located so I can research the possibility of visiting in person.

    • Hey – thank you for reaching out. I hear you too. I have had many periods of frustration on my own path, but these periods usually indicate to me that I’m resisting being where I am. I don’t want “what is” (right now) to be true. Your question is a really good one though – HOW do we “be where we are?” I feel inspired to film a follow up to this video based on your question. In the meantime, I am opening a few spots per month soon for 1-1 Zoom consultations with me, for body pain relief via fascia release and also mind-body coaching. I’m located in Durango, CO FYI. If you want to be notified when I open for Zoom consults, please email [email protected] and let me know so we can get you on that list. And THANK YOU for your important question. For now, my answer is…be brave enough to name what is, feel what is, and get curious about what is, no matter how painful these experiences. One quick example: at age 24, I wrote in a journal “I am utterly traumatized” – and my entire body RELAXED. Because I had just acknowledged the truth of what is, something my body had been trying to tell me for 11 years with anxiety, digestive issues, jaw pain, knee pain, systemic tension. I wanted to be “normal” so I ignored my body and ignored my trauma. A huge weight lifted the day I wrote those words in a journal. But I won’t lie – it also meant I had to start the hard work of actually healing. I’ll save the rest for my video. Sending you love 💛

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