Experience More Freedom By Working WITH Your Fears Instead of Against Them

There’s a lot of talk about fear in the personal development world. Slogans like “fuck fear” abound on the one hand, and on the other (more spiritual side) we hear things like “fear is the opposite of love.” 

What if we have it backwards? 

What if fear comes from a deeply buried and rightful place of longing to be loved? 

What if, because this is a place we rarely visit or pay tribute to (which would require us to turn and face ourselves, confront our pain, our grief and deepest desires), fear does the protective work for us?

However misguided at times, I don’t believe that your fears are against you. I believe the greater our capacity to feel and face our deepest fears, the greater our capacity to name and nurture our deepest longings. 

In my opinion we’ve erroneously maligned fear, and it’s actually our rejection of it that makes it grow more pervasive in our culture. 

Fear exists for a reason: it can save your life!

And, like everything protective and useful for survival, it doesn’t necessarily help you thrive. However, trying to eradicate fear or march forward in protest against it, rarely serves us. 

What can we do?

We can put fear in its rightful place. 

What does that mean? 

I will simply share the practices I’ve cultivated, and what has worked well for me. 

I attribute most of my “success” in life (with my healing endeavors, relationships and business to name just a few) to my ability to dance with fear and in doing so find my FAITH. I’ve accepted that fear has its rightful place in my life and can actually be a powerful teacher. 

Many of my fears were/are 100% valid. 

Fear of rejection, judgment, disconnection…they’ve all happened. My fears were valid!

Trying to banish fear from my life only left me numb, empty and trying to operate “on top” of a big pile of my own shit that I needed to face, take responsibility for and transform into possibility. 

This is where a lot of our subconscious self-sabotage patterns kick in. 

If we don’t turn towards our fears and face them, we will likely be driven by them at the subconscious level. 

What if fear is actually a harbinger of possibility? 

The possibility of connection, inclusion, acceptance, fulfillment. 

The thing is, we’re not guaranteed anything in life. We’re not guaranteed love, connection or a life without an ounce of shame or pain. 

Honoring our fears means accepting potential risks and consequences, while being open to possibility. 

I’ve come to experience that the greater my capacity for welcoming and feeling my fears fully, the greater my capacity to identify and commit myself to creating what I most long for. 

In today’s video I walk you through my step by step process for working WITH your fears, not against them. In this way, you become a conscious creator and the director of your life. 

By doing this work, of turning towards your fears and actually welcoming them (without letting them run the show) you will experience more FREEDOM. You will also be able to move fear out of your body, so it doesn’t get stuck there where it can wreak havoc. 

Please share your takeaways below, and thank you for watching/reading! 

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  • Susan says:

    Swearing can sometimes be a way to get your point across when nothing else will do. Doesn’t bother me a bit, and I know she does not used those words lightly.

  • Cheryl says:

    Elisha, thank you so much for your work. I must tell you tho, I find the use of swear words offensive and i think it makes one look unprofessional. Thank you for listening 😉 Keep up the good work you do.

  • Christine says:

    I really appreciate this. This resonates with me. I think it’s important to not allow fear to be the master, rather than to just say fear is not real or should be ignored. And the anecdote of going public with your story resonates with me. I have had a lot of people say “you should write your story” but I’m realistically aware of the fallout and have decided the risk is not worth the reward to me at this time. I also think that realizing when I am “catastrophizing” is helpful. Yes, maybe the fear is valid but is it likely? We’re dealing with a job layoff and the fear is “we will never get another good job.” Possible? Yes. Likely? No. So putting the fear into some framework can also help master it rather than letting it master me.

  • Darlene depasquale says:

    Dear Elisha,
    Thank you so much for this video today. I’m going through a lot of fear right now and this was so helpful. I watch your videos and I just want to appreciate you for your openness in sharing.
    I feel much better after going through step by step with you.
    In gratitude,

    • Hi Darlene – I am SO happy to read this from you! Thank you for sharing that these steps helped you. Wishing you well on this journey!

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