Wow – BIG news this week on #fascianista (where you follow my own healing journey from mercury poisoning and childhood trauma patterns). So much happened in such a short period of time!
I got my hormone test results back, which revealed that I’m depleted in all sex hormones and very low in cortisol, which indicates adrenal fatigue or adrenal burnout (I’m not sure if I’m in full on burnout, as no Dr. has diagnosed me, but my levels were really low and the testing lab writes notes under the results explaining what the levels could indicate).
This is no surprise, since the last 2 years were the most stressful of my entire life. So basically, I’ve been pushing my car down the freeway at 60 mph from behind, on sheer willpower and grit, without any gas in the tank. No wonder I’m so tired! I’m listening to my body, and I haven’t been using an alarm since we moved to Durango. I’m letting myself sleep a lot. This also explains the exercise intolerance and muscle wasting from the past year. I’ve got some rest and repair to do here.
My appointment with Dr. Mindy was mostly good. Recent life events have made me hyper aware of how picky I want to be when it comes to who is in my life, from friendships to family to doctors. I’m allowing myself to be radically honest about what feels good and what doesn’t feel good. This appointment felt mostly good, but since I’m allowing myself to notice every little thing…there were a few things that didn’t feel great. I elaborate in the video. Mostly this had to do with presence, and wanting a more palpable attunement to me rather than my symptoms.
We filmed 95 Kinetix Practitioner technique videos in 4 days (with an AWESOME production crew that I allowed myself to choose when the previous crew didn’t meet my needs and we cut ties…there’s that theme again of radical honesty about what feels good and what doesn’t!) I’m pretty sure my adrenals weren’t too happy with me…but I did my best to get support during this process.
After our filming bonanza, I got stepped on for 2 hours…and had a fascinating detox experience afterwards.
My BRAIN started dumping toxins, after I released my entire body’s superficial fascia/lymph, from the tops of my feet to my cervical and anterior neck fascia. While my own efforts at self lymph drainage have felt fruitful, this was next level and has me even more passionate about getting Kinetix out there; not just for pain relief but for effective, safe and rapid detox too. Learn more in the video.
Finally, I decided to stop talking to my parents this week. I stopped talking to my brother last December (and almost stopped talking to my parents then as well, but didn’t in part due to my dad undergoing two amputation surgeries and almost dying). I made this decision after giving myself permission to no longer accept certain behaviors towards (and words spoken to) me. I gave this family dynamic 20+ years to shift, and I am ready to move forward in my life feeling really good about the people in it. Yes, they are family; and NO, it’s not acceptable to me any longer to be treated certain ways, or participate in something that feels deeply unhealthy to me.
The reason I stopped talking to my parents has to do with some deeply ingrained enmeshment patterns between all four of us, that I no longer want to participate in.
I’ve made requests about what I need to reconnect. I leave them all free, and I no longer feel attached to their personal progress or the stories they may tell themselves about me. To be clear, I played my own role in our family enmeshment and found it impossible to fully extricate myself while staying in relationship with them. I see now that the role I played in my family enmeshment has been playing itself out in all of my relationships, and I am ready for something new. I’m ready for true intimacy, lasting friendships and community that is supportive, empathetic, authentic and feels GOOD.
Thanks for watching and following along!